Why You Should Just Get Over It

“The moment I start hating man, I become his slave”

A quote from Dr. McMillen, that resides right on my computer wallpaper. It serves me as a reminder, that by staying mad I’m really only hurting myself. Whenever I feel like someone wronged me, I see this quote and leverage it to feel alive. When I say feel alive, I mean fully experience my emotions and than let them go, instead of dwelling on them.

How many times have you gotten angry at somebody, and stayed angry for a long time? At your ex-boyfriend, boss, commute, or a stranger that looked at you the wrong way. Whether you bottle it up, or go on and on about it, you’re becoming their slave. By engrossing yourself in such thoughts, you are stressing yourself out, and continuing the situation in your world.

Can’t go to sleep at night because you are so mad? Guess what? The person you are mad at is at home, sound asleep. This means they win and you lose. Want to win? Take a deep breath and exhale the very thought of them. Just let your mind be calm, or keep it occupied with something fun, educational, or productive.

Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation. Yes, I’m quoting Benjamin Franklin from the Becoming Outstanding series on the virtue of Silence. These situations are the reason he set this virtue as one of his life goals. So he wouldn’t waste his breath, energy, and time by going on about insignificant problems.

What better way to become more productive, improve your time management, and your relationship with yourself than gaining freedom. Stop being their slave and just get over it!

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Posted by in Relationships | March 26, 2007 | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumble | Print | 9 comments

  • http://daveolson.ca Dave Olson

    Great thoughts Alex. One practice that I started a few years ago was each morning I evaluate my emotions, allow myself to feel them and then move on. That way nothing tends to build up over time. Can’t find the netscape button, but I’ll get over it. :-)

  • http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/personal-effectiveness/5534-what-your-favorite-quotes.html#post55518 What are Your Favorite Quotes? – Personal Development for Smart People Forums

    [...] ?The moment I start hating man, I become his slave? ~ By Dr. McMillen. I wrote about it in my post Why You Should Just Get Over It and mentioned how it helps me to gain a little bit more time and sanity in my life, but not letting other people stress me out. __________________ Alex Shalman . com – Practical Personal Development Introducing Personal Development Bootcamp – The Easier-Than-It-Sounds Guide To Living An Outstanding Life. [...]

  • Michael

    I’ve always had a tough time with this. I tend to get very frustrated with people after an extended period of time and from then on, I can be a real jerk. I guess there’s just something that can hold you back sometimes, but I’m sure we’d all be better off using your suggestions.

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    [...] I start hating a man, I become his slave”, a quote from Dr. McMillen, is a beginning of another? article. Related PostsLooking at The MirrorAlexRadich dot Com Had Been RegisteredTo Live In Congruence With [...]

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  • http://wwwidatewhite.com Eathan

    Great theory. I believe more people should live by this theory.

  • http://idatewhite.com/2008/03/19/shes-not-over-him/   She’s not over him by I Date White

    [...] I could list several? reasons why she? needs to get over him.? She will achieve? a new sense of freedom when she does.? MD36 spent about 90 minutes talking to me and watching the Dallas Mavericks [...]

  • Betty

    I read your column & you are right, why give your power away! It took me many months to get over a jerk, finally I was there……. then one day, I recieved a message from his friend stating that he had died in a car accident and that before he died he told his friend to tell me that he was sorry and that maybe I was the best thing that happened to him. It turns I was the victim of a sick joke! I was furious so i messaged him wishing him a nice death! I guess thats the reaction he was looking for, I found myself at square one. But I now tell myself him being a jerk is his problem not mine! (oh, just for the record he is an Alex and looks somewhat like you… It’s freaky…but i won’t let it get to me)