Seven Questions You’re Afraid To Ask Yourself

Seven Questions You’re Afraid To Ask Yourself

One of my first articles explained the process of self-reflection and why it should be a major tool used to address progress in your life. The seven questions that will change your life gave you a way to pause and analyze your week, to see if you’re keeping on track with all your important goals. A week is enough time to go off-course and to allow you to pull yourself back on track.

“He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.”
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

On the heels of those seven questions, I’ve been thinking about the questions that we’re often afraid to ask ourselves. The reason for this fear is that we’re probably too scared to face the questions, thus, we suppress them and push them out of our mind.

Here are some questions that I find useful for self reflection. You can just add these to your weekly self assessment or reflection journal. Write them down, and write why you think your answer is what it is; then write down what changes you can make to create a more favorable outcome for yourself.

  1. Does anybody love me?
  2. Am I ‘really’ successful?
  3. Am I proud of myself?
  4. When I die, will I be surrounded by people I love?
  5. Do I have integrity and keep all my promises?
  6. Am I doing everything I can to reach my goals?
  7. Would I be friends with myself?

The writing journal (or journal diary) is a great place to answer questions. Anthony Robbins says that our minds are specifically built to ask questions, and whatever questions we ask we’ll get an answer for. The trouble is that often times people keep asking the wrong questions. I hope these life questions will guide you in a more positive direction.

A great exercise to do right before you begin to write is to stand in front of a mirror. Take 10 minutes to just stand, keeping focused eye contact with yourself. Embrace all the thoughts that go through your mind, and then go answer the questions you see above.

When you ask yourself the questions that you’re afraid to ask yourself, you’re put in the position of looking truth right in the face. This gives you access to the possibility of self-improvement, self-love, and happiness.

What things will you discover if you stare these seven hard questions dead in the eyes?

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Posted by in Personal Development | August 7, 2008 | Digg | | Stumble | Print | 22 comments

  • Shanel Yang

    Great post, Alex! I wrote about some famous people who kept diaries, including many you’d never suspect, in a post called “10 Reasons to Keep a Diary” at and 20 questions to assess whether you even need to keep striving for more happiness at

  • Lewis

    Tough questions Alex. Mostly because some may not want to know the truth behind those answers. It could be scary if you found out the wrong thing from asking them-but that gives you all the more reason to face and start the growth process.


  • Shamelle

    well.. if one can answer these questions without loosing any sleep, either they have had a “good” life or they simply don’t care ;-0)

  • MrAchievement (Stanley Bronstein)

    Good stuff as usual Alex. I especially like #5 – Do I have integrity ???

    Answer, I think so, but we sometimes lose business because we do the right thing instead of the “easy” thing.

    Stanley Bronstein

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  • ayesha parveen

    very well-written. these 7 questions indeed would help a person in understanding himself.

  • FatIgor

    I would say no to all of them, but I don’t care. I only ended up here because I was whiling away time hitting the stumble button in my browser.

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  • Brad Spencer

    Very hard hitting questions. I think this is one of the better articles I’ve read recently on true “self-improvement.” If you can’t ask yourself the hard questions, how can you really expect to improve. Nothing should be hidden from self-analysis b/c that is the true path to enlightenment in my opinion.

    Thanks for giving me yet another great point to start thinking about my life.

    Cheers my friend,

    Brad Spencer

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  • Tonya Pavlovec

    Good Question, I don’t know what the answers would be. I’d like to think that i know what the answers are but do we really know that answers or do we just make up an answer that we want to hear?

  • umesh

    I have tried making journals many times but always ended up writing stories πŸ™‚

    I guess our experiences and the experiences of people around us are recorded by our brain as a journal, whenever a matched situation comes, it is recalled directly and we behave accordingly.

    I am not afraid with the above given seven questions as I have many people loving me (although nowadays i am isolated for short time)… talking about goals and promises, it might take time but i am doing what i should be…working hard..

    however, thnks for reminding such questions..


    First : thank you so much for this article

    Now i will answer the questions :

    1 Does anybody love me?

    I can not answer this questions exactly but if i am a good man , then maybe the love come to me πŸ™‚

    2 Am I β€˜really’ successful?
    This question is very hard i can not tell you that i am successful in my life or job , etc. but there is a lot of fail in my entire life , but i am successful too in other things like relationships and job.

    3 Am I proud of myself?
    Yes i am proud of my self , i did not anything wrong with anybody , that is it πŸ™‚

    4 When I die, will I be surrounded by people I love?
    My dear only God ” Allah ” know that , i am not afrid of death is the life style πŸ™‚

    5 Do I have integrity and keep all my promises?
    Yes i am keeping my promises if i can when i can where i can πŸ™‚

    6 Am I doing everything I can to reach my goals?
    Nobody can do everything to him/her self , this is live high levels and other lows πŸ™‚

    7 Would I be friends with myself?
    Yes i am friend of my self , Then Yes i will πŸ™‚

    Thanks again but i am just a kid i am 20 years old , i did not see any thing in our life πŸ™‚

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  • Doug Rosbury

    Don’t ask. If you ask, you are compelled to answer. It’s much better to encourage faith in yourself and to assume that anything you wish to achieve, is well within your capability. To question, is to doubt. Don’t get entrapped in constant questioning. It is
    a never ending anxiety and will make of you, a basket case. Live in a state of constant faith. You have no more powerful way with faith to have a happy life in perfect self esteem.

  • tom

    1. Does anybody love me?
    I don’t know, I know i love myself
    2. Am I β€˜really’ successful?
    Hell ya, enjoying what I do is awesome, always room for improvement
    3. Am I proud of myself?
    more then ever
    4. When I die, will I be surrounded by people I love?
    what is the significance of death? What happens after we “die”?
    5. Do I have integrity and keep all my promises?
    Certainly, if i don’t I only lie to myself
    6. Am I doing everything I can to reach my goals?
    Mostly yes
    7. Would I be friends with myself?
    Yes, I am my best friend

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  • woman21

    To answer these questions honestly all one has to do is not fear the truth.

    Does anybody love me? Yes
    Am I really succuessful? I’m not even kind of successful
    Am I proud of myself? Overall no
    Whe I die, will I be surrounded by people I love? Yes but I will not be enough I need to leave an impact on the world.
    Do I have integrity and keep all my promises? Of course I don’t keep them al but id call myself I woman of my word. And I pride myself in integrity.
    Am I doing everything to reach my goals? I don’t have real goals.
    Would I be friends of myself? No probably not. I don get alon with opinionated people.

    With forgiveness for myself and belief in myself can I change these answers? I have douts, but I have been wrong.