Those who have ever valued liberty for its own sake believed that to be free to choose, and not to be chosen for, is an unalienable ingredient in what makes human beings human. ~Isaiah Berlin

Though I generally procrastinate when it comes to reading long fictions, last summer, and due to a twentieth century Russian literature class that I have taken this Fall, I have been inundated with countless philosophies.

I was astounded by so many of the recent novels that I have read, ranging from Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead and Mikhail Bulgakov’s The Master and Margarita, to pieces in the style of Socialist Realism and those opposing it. It was in this context, the context set particularly by The Fountainhead, that I quite suddenly came to discover the countless contradictions surrounding social philosophies.

The problem is not vested in finding the ultimate philosophical answer to how everything works. It is, however, the question of “how should I live to optimize my experience of life“?, a question that is not only relevant but entirely subject to our beliefs about ourselves.

This is something we may wonder from time to time along with the notions of love, interconnection, and social responsibility. And it is no wonder that such questions are juxtaposed because it is so difficult for us to separate ourselves from our circumstances.

For this reason, rules that we establish for ourselves may come with contradictions. For instance, if you proclaim to be a utilitarian, then ideally, you will save two people from a burning building rather than one. In practice, supposing that you have the power to save either two people who are unconnected to you or your  child, I would argue that you would save your child, regardless of your position on utilitarianism.

So although I like utilitarianism in theory, if I were to be asked which philosophy would be the most suitable for me and for others, it would be that of the rational egoist, the individualist achiever who is thwarted only by his own rational understanding of the world that he inhabits.

Selfishness vs Selflessness

“That’s the trouble with victims – they don’t even know they’re victims, which is as it should be, but it does become monotonous and take half the fun away. You’re such a rare treat – a victim who can appreciate the artistry of its own execution…” Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead

There is nothing wrong with being selfish, in the respect that I will further explain. If we are to examine all of our actions, we will see how selfish they really are, even if we hope to receive no praise or glory for them at all, and even if we end up feeling victimized.

The state of feeling victimized is, itself, a selfish feeling. When you feel victimized, you separate yourself from the world with the excuse that another, or others are the cause of this separation. When you feel victimized you experience selfishness that is rooted in selflessness, perhaps the most dis-empowering feeling that a human being can expose himself to. Selflessness, in this respect, is the relocation of the responsibility of the outcome of your fate upon another person, a product of a person’s giving up his or her “self”. This happens when we allow another person or group to form our opinions for us mindlessly, when we relinquish our fate to the will of others, and when we settle for what society believes is right above our own best judgment. It is easy to be selfless, and through a person’s attempt to simplify his life by blinding himself to personal reality, that person is still selfish in a way that can hurt him.

This concept is illustrated in The Fountainhead, in which people are faced with the society’s glorification of mediocrity and the extent of effect of the spoken word on people’s beliefs. People within the society do not necessarily value talent, but rather the acknowledgment that comes from shameless conformation to the whims of the chosen arbiters of opinion. The society is geared toward “selflessness”, not only in refusing the pleasure of true art and form, but in refusing a personal opinion and a self-motivated goal.

It is, therefore, hardly a wonder that every attempt at socialism is an attempt to oust the individual out of existence. It is an unnatural way to keep people under control, and for that reason, Soviet authors (who only know this notion too well) employ commentaries within their works to serve as extreme facets of the ultimate vision. Andrei Platonov, in The Foundation Pit, for instance, writes how even groups of horses collectivized their hay. In Envy, Yuri Olesha characterizes the new, advanced man, as one who lives for the society, and not for himself, a machine devoid of unnecessary emotions. These are the ultimate forms of selflessness, not only because they are acts that further a society, but because they deny people of self.

Selfishness does not necessarily mean denying help, love, or greatness to others because of an extreme love for oneself and unwillingness to share glory, though this too can be selfishness. What I speak of is individuality and responsibility to oneself above all, even if this responsibility to oneself translates into the responsibility to others. This definition works particularly because a selfish person can acknowledge that even acts of love are selfish because they start from a desire to love.

Argument for Individualism

“I often think that he’s the only one of us who’s achieved immortality. I don’t mean in the sense of fame and I don’t mean that he won’t die some day. But he’s living it. I think he is what the conception really means. You know how people long to be eternal. But they die with every day that passes. When you meet them, they’re not what you met last. In any given hour, they kill some part of themselves. They change, they deny, they contradict–and they call it growth. At the end there’s nothing left, nothing unrevered or unbetrayed; as if there had never been any entity, only a succession of adjectives fading in and out on an unformed mass. How do they expect a permanence which they have never held for a single moment? But Howard–one can imagine him existing forever.”~ Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead

This was Peter Keating, a mediocrity who thrived as a leech on the perceptions of others, talking about Howard Roark, a talented individualist who’s work had the intrinsic value of the art of a master. In the above quote, Peter recognizes that the liberty with which Roark works assures his immortality. Unlike Keating, whose talent was a manifestation of the whims of others, Roark lived for himself and his work was timeless. He allowed no one to tell him what to do or how to do it, and he lived with his principles, neither attacking nor desiring to be a part of society.

This is to say that being an individualist is very difficult, and those who choose the path may suffer tremendous criticism at the hands of others. People may not understand their reasoning and their zeal, just as people did not understand why Roark refused to take certain commissions as an architect. At the same time, individualists are free because they take responsibility for their own lives and they stop at nothing to do what is right by their own standards. This is selfish, but it is also liberating.

There may be millions of people out there who took the path of someone else, who blinded themselves to clear signals, and who immersed themselves in life’s little nuances and steered themselves away from their dreams. These people may be living in the world today, though they may already be dead by way of spirit.

What does this mean for us?

“Do not, under any circumstances, belittle a work of fiction by trying to turn it into a carbon copy of real life; what we search for in fiction is not so much reality but the epiphany of truth.”
— Azar Nafisi, Reading Lolita in Tehran

Where do we fit in? The novel, sadly, is far from the only place in which we see people relinquishing rights they have over themselves to others who do not seek and will not nurture the responsibility precisely because they too are merely worrying about looking good and not looking bad. Millions of people, at best, victimize themselves in their situations, and at worst, forge completely unfulfilling goals and live unfulfilling lives because of their own fear of themselves. It is in these cases that we may need to stop and ask ourselves where we are being selfless and why we are doing so. Why should we allow ourselves to live the cookie cutter versions of what we may perceive acceptable instead of the great lives that we can potentially be living?

I now call on you and ask you to tell us in which cases you believe we should be selfish? What are the implications?

Thank you to Marina Tsipenyuk, for writing this great article!

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

Simplicity is the key ingredient in productivity, and living a great life should be the main motivator for being productive. After all, if you can accomplish the same amount of work in less time, then you’re free to explore more of what interests you.

In order to make the idea of living a great life your motivator, it’s important for you to define what exactly you will be spending your free time on. For this reason, setting big goals, such as 5-10-20 year plans is absolutely critical.

Once you’re excited about the idea that anything is possible in your life, you can proceed to learn about the…

4 Simple Laws of Productivity

1. Outsource – I’m not focusing strictly on outsourcing tasks to virtual assistants, although that has the potential to be a very useful system. In essence, you want to delegate your work to someone that can either do it cheaper, more efficiently, or in a shorter amount of time. You can choose a virtual assistant like I mentioned, or simply use the resources you already have such as co-workers, family members, and friends, who are in a better position to come up with a solution to your problems.
2. Automatize – With the technology we have today, it’s very feasible to get things done without anyone actually doing them. This is shown through electronic bill reminders that are set on recurrent monthly payments, as well as monthly deliveries of essential supplies, without the trouble of having to reorder. The more things you can automatize, the more time you free up for other activities.
3. Withdraw – Not all tasks were created equally, and some aren’t even necessary. Your job is to define what’s necessary in your life. This might lead to you denying your services to your family, friends, or employers in order to concentrate on the actions that are more important to your personal goals. There is never a good excuse for not going for your most important goals. You can also trim back, instead of completely withdrawing from certain projects, so that you’re still connected, but not overwhelmed.
4. Focus – We previously defined simplicity as the key ingredient in productivity, which makes multitasking the antithesis of productivity. In order to get things done, and make serious progress on projects and tasks, it’s essential to stick to one project at a time and one task at a time. This is accomplished by tuning out all distractions and blocking off periods of time to work without phone/e-mail interruptions.

Starting last week I began to use a very effective, and simultaneously simple, productivity system known as Todoodlist. It combines some of the concepts above, along with with a paper based productivity system, which allowed me to back away from my technology and get some real work done (even though half the work had to do with writing, videos, and podcasts).

Here are some of the things I’ve been able to bang out just this weekend using the Toododlist productivity system.

1. Edited and reviewed half a dozen podcast interviews
2. Setup, scheduled, and prepared for dental school interview
3. Organized my e-mail, gmail filters/labels and contact groups
4. Cleared my desk, car, laundry, bookshelf, garbage and vacuumed my entire workspace
5. Wrote 4 articles, brainstormed a dozen others, made a video, and updated the resources section of the blog
6. Creatively planned Thanksgiving, 1 year anniversary, and New Years ideas.

This was done alongside working, interning, spending time with Marina, and doing yard work(raking leaves) around the house. The simple fact is that the more I put on my plate, the more I was able to get done, and the more free time I had to enjoy myself.

The best part is that even my free time became more fun because a) I felt like I deserved the free time for all the hard work I put in and b) because I was in such a great mindset for planning, I was able to make the best of the leisure time that I had.

Remember what I said, you don’t need to buy a system in order to be more productive, you merely need to know the fundamentals. When you have the fundamentals, you can take the time to create your own system. In my case, I decided to outsource the making of my system to the Todoodlist program, which enabled me to have one of the most productive weekends ever.

What are you waiting for? Go get your Todoodlist.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

Back in the day, and you know a story is good when it starts with ‘back in the day‘, I started to read a lot of books on picking up women. It was the thing to do, all the cool kids were doing it. Anyway, I quickly realized that much of what was written in these books was geared for guys to improve themselves inside out.

There’s also the whole other side to ‘pick up‘, which involves silly carnival tricks, gimmicks, and pick up lines. That’s not the side that got me on the path of personal development, and it’s not the side that holds my interest today.

What makes this book different is that it’s not a guide for how to get a one night stand, or sleep with as many women as your ‘heart’ desires. It’s a look into the concepts and mentality of dating with the ultimate goal of marriage in mind.

Table of Contents

1. Preliminary Introspection
2. Building Confidence
3. Approaching
4. Communicating Powerfully
5. Asking Her Out
6. Dating Essentials
7. Recommended Resources

This book is both a 47 page compilation of some of my best relationship articles, as well as some original content written specifically for this ebook. The overall content has something for everybody.

Don’t be fooled into thinking that this guide is for guys only. It’s not. While I do take the tone of speaking as a guy, to other guys, the actual book has a lot to offer to both species… ahem, genders.

Since this book speaks about interpersonal interactions, it can just as easily be applied to cultivating business relationships, not just personal ones.

Get Your Free Copy

This book is free of charge. No donations necessary. The only thing I’m going to ask is that you subscribe to my free newsletter, or subscribe to my RSS feed via feedreader or e-mail.

The reason I don’t put the download link right on this page is two fold. One is that I want to control download rate, and the other is that I want to increase the subscriber base of the site. You get free book, I get to provide you with free content in the future. Sounds like a good deal to me.

When you subscribe to my newsletter, you will receive an initial e-mail with a download link. If you’re already a subscriber, I will send out a broadcast e-mail with a link for you. When you subscribe through RSS, feedreader or e-mail, you’ll be able to find a download link at the bottom of the article.

You can sign up to the newsletter by clicking this link, or by entering your name and e-mail in the right hand side of the sidebar. You can sign up for RSS by clicking this link.

Acknowledgement

Big thanks goes to Joshua Denney, who has been my slave for the past 24 hours, working non-stop to get this ebook packaged to meet the deadline. You can e-mail him at Think Web Strategy for design inquiries.

There are more very special acknowledgments at the end of the book, but you’ll just have to download to see. Thank you very much to everyone who did help, and a big thank you to those who inspired me.

Huge thanks goes out to my readers. You give my life purpose each and every day, and I appreciate you tremendously.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

Have you ever found a book that you like so much that you read it, highlighted it, wrote in the margins, put flags on your favorite passages, and reread it over and over? Well, that’s how I feel about Steve Pavlina’s new book Personal Development for Smart People.

It’s been over a month since I’ve received my copy of this book, and to tell you the truth I haven’t been able to put it down. Half way through the book I promised myself that I would reread the whole thing every 3-6 months, but I already lost track of how many times I’ve read it.

The book itself is much different from the hundreds of personal development books that I’ve read to date. What makes it unique, and worth taking a look at, is that it doesn’t try to force feed you the author’s idea on how you should be living your life.

Personal Development for Smart People gently guides you on a path to your own core, by making three very brilliant distinctions on Truth, Love, and Power. These three values prove to be fundamental in living the most fulfilling life that is most suited for you.

I feel like a lot of other self-help books give you fish. They give you a specific idea, or specific tool, that can help you solve one specific problem. This book is different, because it doesn’t just give you tools, but it teaches you how to make tools — it trains your mind for problem solving, and that’s a skill you could take anywhere in life.

Honesty With Yourself

In the very first chapter of this book, there is a small self-assessment that asks the reader to honestly evaluate the area of their life. This evaluation isn’t based on where you currently stand, but on the path that you’re heading on.

After doing the evaluation, I decided that I needed to jump start my personal health and fitness goals. I’m 23, and I’m pretty healthy, but looking at my path I was just gaining weight by under exercising and overeating on empty calories. I ended up with a 1 rating for my health, and began to take action. Only three weeks into this month and I’ve already lost 13 pounds, noticeably improved my diet, and ran two official races with New York Road Runners.

I read personal development books all the time, and I write about it on my site, and despite of this I’m just as capable of getting into a slump as the next guy. Steve Pavlina’s book not only motivated me, but refreshed what I already know about commitment to goals, progressive improvement, and persistence.

While going through this past month, with the knowledge of Steve Pavlina’s book stirring inside my mind and my soul, I’ve noticed several synchronicities. The first thing I’ve already mentioned is the marked improvement to my overall health. The second thing I noticed is more income opportunities that I’m able to cash in on, such as getting extra work, making more from internet marketing, and disabling certain money spending habits that were not constructive.

Lastly, I noticed a huge markup in my networking opportunities. I’ve met several people that are going to be invaluable in my career, and others that will be very instrumental for my friends and inner circle. I’ve also connected with really interesting people, both online and off, that are going to make tremendous contributions to the flourishing future of this website.

Free Preview

Steve Pavlina and the team at Hay House publishing are nice enough to offer a preview of Personal Development for Smart People. They sent me a copy of the Introduction and Chapter 1 (Truth) that I can distribute. I know chapter 1 in and out, and I know that after reading it you’re going to want to go out and buy the book.

One thing I particularly enjoyed about the first chapter, after it describes all of the components of truth in detail, are the examples of every day blocks to truth that we face.

The Core Message of the Book

Seek truth with open eyes. Courageously accept your discoveries and their consequences. Rid your life of falsehood, denial, and fear of what is. Make truth your ally, not your enemy. This isn’t easy, but it is correct.

Share your love openly. Connect with yourself and others by tuning in to the connection that already exists. The risk of rejection is overshadowed by the rewards of loving connections. Whenever you feel disconnected, reach out and connect with another human being. Remember that you’re always loved.

~Steve Pavlina

Order Now

The book is in stores, and on Amazon.com. All that’s left for you to do is take advantage of this opportunity and get your very own copy.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

Ten years ago I decided to take a more scientific investigation into the concept of luck. I decided that the best method was to examine why some people are consistently lucky whilst others encounter little but ill fortune. In short, why some people seem to live charmed lives full of lucky breaks and chance encounters, while others experience one disaster after another. ~Dr. Richard Wiseman

Editor’s Note: This is a guest article by Stu.

If you’re anything like me you probably thought being lucky or unlucky was just random chance, and omens and talismans had no effect on your life. Black cats are just cats, mirrors are made of glass and are bound to break, and a rabbit’s foot belongs on a rabbit.

And you will probably be happy to know that to increase your luck you don’t have to start carrying around animal feet.

Dr. Wiseman, author of The Luck Factor, did a 10 year study of luck. He found people who considered themselves to be very lucky and people who considered themselves to be very unlucky and he looked to see if there was any difference between the two groups.

He found four major differences. Lucky people are good at:

1. Creating and noticing chance opportunities
2. Making decisions by listening to their intuition
3. Creating self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations
4. Adopting a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good

Dr. Wiseman didn’t stop there though. He took what he had learned and made a ‘luck school’. Unfortunately the good doctor doesn’t go in to much detail on specific exercises that he got people to do at his luck school, and I couldn’t find anything in any of his research, but knowing the four things we’re trying to develop it’s easy to come up with some effective exercises.

Creating and noticing chance opportunities:

• Change up your daily routine – Dr. Wiseman found that this was a common practice of lucky people. You could do something like take a different route to work or school each day, or go shopping for groceries somewhere new.
• Talk to people you wouldn’t normally talk to – Dr. Wiseman found that one lucky person would pick a color before going to a party and only talk to people wearing that color.
• Try something new – You could join a sports team or organization, go to poetry reading or an art gallery, take a class at a local college or even take a walk in the park. Get out and create opportunities for luck

Making decisions by listening to their intuition:

• Practice going with your gut instinct – Next time someone asks you something, just blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. Turn the verbal filter off for a little while.
• Understand your intuition – Next time you judge someone by a first impression take a serious look at how you came to that judgment. If you understand your intuition you’re more likely to trust it.

Creating self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations:

• Get rid of negative thoughts and expectations – An important part of thinking positively is not thinking negatively. Every negative situation is an opportunity to think positively.
• Best case scenario – Write down or just think about how your positive expectations are going to come true. This is a trick I’ve picked up from playing a lot of sports. Visualizing myself kicking the soccer ball and seeing it go into the net makes that scenario more likely to happen.

Adopting a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good:

• See the silver lining – Dr. Wiseman presented his lucky and unlucky groups with a scenario where they were in a bank while it was being robbed and they got shot in the arm. The unlucky people viewed this as very unlucky, whereas the lucky people thought they were lucky they hadn’t been killed.
• How are you benefiting? – If you were to lose your job for instance, how would you benefit from it? Possibilities include more free time, the opportunity to find a better job, and the chance to meet new people at a new job.
• How has bad luck helped you? – Take a look at the last month and trace back the circumstances that led to something good happening. Chances are that somewhere along the way some bad luck entered into the equation, and yet you achieved a positive outcome.

In the end, being lucky has nothing to do with luck. It’s a lifestyle that creates opportunity and fosters a positive outlook. Being lucky is simply being a better, more outgoing person.

Further Reading:
The Luck Factor (pdf) by Richard Wiseman

About the Author

This guest post is by Stu, who blogs at Improved Lives and writes about how to use psychology for personal growth in posts like 112 Quick and Easy Personal Growth Exercises.

If you like this article please vote for it on StumbleUpon and Digg it. I’m currently accepting more guest articles.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

“There are two fools in this world. One is the millionaire who thinks that by hoarding money he can somehow accumulate real power, and the other is the penniless reformer who thinks that if only he can take the money from one class and give it to another, all the world’s ills will be cured.”
~Henry Ford

For over a week I’ve been listening to The Millionaire Mind by Thomas J. Stanley while commuting in my car. He interviewed ~1000 millionaires since 1980 and taken very meticulous surveys of their responses.

Not only have I gained dozens of GEMS about what it takes to becoming a Millionaire from this program, but I learned to think different. I learned to think the way millionaire’s think, or so I hope!

One of the interesting survey questions is what all of those millionaires contributes their success to. So without further ado, here is a list of their top 13, from most important to least (but still really important). With my commentary.

Success Factors

1. Being honest with all people. The great thing about this factor is that it is accessible to anyone and you can start right away. Just be honest. It sounds simple, but it requires a bit of courage at some points. So do it- it’s the top success factor.
2. Having a supportive spouse. While being attracted to someone is really important, perhaps even necessary, it’s not the criteria by which one should go spouse-shopping. I would personally say, and the millionaires would agree, that having a kind, supportive spouse, who has similar goals, and is responsible is more important.
3. Getting along with people. I can’t thing of having any job, business, or career that has zero involvement with people and has monetary value. You can see how this would be in the top 3, right?
4. Loving career or business. The passion and love for your career will make work not work anymore. Sure it might be really hard at times. When you combine the passion with your discipline you will be propelled to new heights.
5. Being physically fit. I stress this in many posts- exercise. If you aren’t taking care of your health, than your mind and body are not working optimally.
6. Having strong leadership qualities. When it comes down to it you will want to delegate as much as you can and concentrate on more important issues. There is only one of you. having this skill is a top priority.
7. Making wise investments.You can make high 6 figure incomes, but if the money doesn’t grow, or if you put it into losing investments than you aren’t optimizing your assets. You’re basically spinning your wheels and wasting your time. You want to reach a point where you could live off of the interest of your investments!
8. Seeing business opportunities. The truth is if you’re in a niche market that is over saturated you’re going to have too much competition to make a real difference. Sure you might rise to the top, but that’s like the chance of you becoming a rock star- slim. If money is what you’re after, not the dream of being number 1 in ‘that’ field, than find an unoccupied niche.
9. Being willing to take financial risk given the right return. One of the ways that I look at this is the financial risk of working for yourself instead of a big company. Yes, you’re risking you X-figure a year job, but the return that you could possibly get is way greater than this. Combined with #8 (seeing opportunities), and doing market research, the risk is much less than you think.
10. Having good mentors. Learning amazing qualities from highly successful people is easier than learning the road on your own. Once your mentality is in the right place, actions are performed, and success follows.
11. Investing in my own business. You have much more control over your own business than you do in the stock market. You can expand, make higher end products, or do whatever it takes to increase your own income.
12. Living below your means. If your expenses are raising as fast as your income you’re never going to save a good amount- no matter what you’re income. When you live before your means and your income raises, do not increase your expenses. This gap will keep getting bigger and bigger and so will your net worth.
13. Having excellent investment advisers. The truth is unless you’re an investment expert you don’t know the best place to put your money. The best people to execute your investments are financial advisers, but according to real millionaires the best people to give financial advice are knowledgeable CPAs and Lawyers.

All that’s left now is the hack your life by implementing these 13 success secrets and you’re on your way!

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

As you may or may not know, one of my goals is to become a 5th generation dentist in my family. This is the reason why I was first attracted to Dr. Joe Capista’s book, What Can A Dentist Teach You About Business, Life & Success? You may remember Dr. Capista from last week’s Happiness Project, in which he answered the questions, with style!

What I’ve learned about Dr. Capista is that he’s basically doing what I want to be doing at a “more advanced” staged of my life (that means when I’m older!). The man has a thriving Dental practice, a great relationship with his family, does public speaking, is in tune with personal development, and believes in life balance. Sounds like a man after my own heart, don’t you think?

Many people have the dream to create a life of abundance, prosperity and contribution. Few people achieve it at the level of Dr. Joe Capista. Rising from the humble upbringing of a young man raised in an era where striving for an average life was the expectation, Joe Capista rose against seemingly insurmountable odds to become one of the most successful people in his industry.

Success – A Five Part Formula

Here is a summary of one of the chapters from this book.

1. Business Success and Life Success are not exclusive of each other. To have TOTAL SUCCESS you need success in both areas.
2. To have TOTAL SUCCESS you need to:
   1. Become an Expert (have a great Product and/or Service)
   2. Develop Sales and Marketing Skills
   3. Get help from Experts (have mentors)
   4. Control your Thoughts
   5. Create Balance in your life
3. You may not be the “best” at what you do, BUT be the best you can be.
4. To be the best in your field requires continued training.
5. The success of your business and success of your personal life is directly proportional to your ability to sell and market.
6. Our lives revolve around selling a Product, Service or idea.
7. Sales is strategic influence, not manipulation.
8. Develop a ‘U’ Attitude.
9. Always have the customer’s interests foremost and have integrity and honesty in your sales process.
10. Sales and Marketing are skills that need to be learned. Very few people are “natural born” sales or marketing people.
11. You need people – mentors – to teach you what you do not know.
12. Find successful people and study their behavior.
13. Mentors can be living or dead.
14. Pay people to teach you what you do not know.

Book Giveaway

Dr. Capista was kind enough to send me several signed copies of his book, What Can A Dentist Teach You About Business, Life & Success? While I’ll be keeping one copy in a special place on my book shelf, I will be giving away 7 copies.

In order to be eligible to win, leave a comment on this post, with what you define as TOTAL SUCCESS! I will choose 7 random winners, and send you a copy of the book. You must comment by Wednesday, March 12th.

Otherwise, go ahead and order your copy from Amazon.com.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

Leo Babauta of Zenhabits has done it once again when he unleashed his second ebook Zen Habits Handbook for Life. You may remember when I reviewed his first ebook, Zen To Done, which had many invaluable productivity principles I use to this very day.

This time Leo tackles the simplicity, productivity and happiness aspects of life in this easy to read 76 page ebook. This ebook contains all those lessons that Leo wishes he was taught before starting out on his adult life. Instead, Leo had to learn the hard way, but through his trials and tribulations was able to achieve success in many aspects of life.

Here are some of Leo’s accomplishments:

• became a runner
• became a vegetarian
• ran a marathon
• became organized and productive
• doubled his income
• completed a triathlon
• started a VERY successful blog
• eliminated his debt
• lost 30 pounds
• sold a successful ebook
• became an early riser
• created a minimalist home

Not to put down what Leo has accomplished, but these goals are not THAT hard to reach. In fact, using principles outlined in Leo’s book, ANYONE can enjoy this level of success. It just takes following the road already layed out, and finding our passions.

Buy this ebook for $6.95

Here’s the table of contents:

Introduction
Section 1: Simplicity

• Decluttering
• Single-tasking
• Edit Your Commitments
• Eiminate All But the Essentials
• Don’t Do Everything on Your To-do List
• The Art of Doing Nothing
• Declutter Your Mind
• 72 Simplicity Tips
• Eat Slower

Section 2: Productivity

• Purpose Your Day: Most Important Tasks
• Focus on the Big Rocks
• Clear Out Your Inbox
• Clear Your Desk
• Become an Early Riser
• Become Motivated When You’re in a Slump
• Make the Most of Your Laziest Days
• Decompress After High Stress

Section 3: Happiness

• Cultivate Compassion in Your Life
• Escape Materialism
• Practical Tips for Living the Golden Rule
• Accept Criticism With Grace and Appreciation
• Have Faith in Humanity, and Restore Kindness
• Boost Your Self-Con?dence
• Live Your Life Consciously

Buy this ebook for $6.95

As soon as I got home, I couldn’t wait to get into my inbox, open this ZH Handbook for Life, and start reading. It was such an easy and inspirational read, and I can’t wait to apply as many of these things to my life immediately.

If you want more info on the book, you can see Leo’s review. As you can tell, I highly recommend the purchase of this book, and you can’t beat the price.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

The time in my life when I got serious about personal development started on the tail end of me studying books on how to pickup women. The whole pickup world became a fun hobby for me and several of my friends, so we ended up reading a few more books than one would deem… healthy. Regardless, it wasn’t long before I realized what the underlying message in these books was, or at least the message that I got out of them.

Become a better you that is more interesting, and more valuable. Pickup is a great way to build confidence and propel people into social interactions that they may not have had the nerve to get into before. In a way, pickup teaches you not to just be socially competent, but excel in all social interactions.

The problem with being just a set of techniques is that after 20 minutes of performing captivating maneuvers to capture the attention and interest of women you will have to start being yourself. Whatever it is that is unique and amazing about you as a person will have to shine eventually.

Neil Strauss, a best selling author and master pickup artist, wrote two books that were of particular interest to me. The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists, which discussed his entry into the seduction community, and how he went from dud to stud. His newest book, Rules of The Game, are actually two books in one, in which he discusses both the light and dark side of the game.

I thought it would be a great opportunity to go and meet Neil Strauss yesterday at his book signing in New York City. I think his ideas are excellent, and despite what his genre, or focus of his business is I believe him to be a very inspirational person for millions of people. Alright, I’m also a fan of his writing, and his stories are definitely captivating, not to mention hilarious.

Regardless if you agree with what the pickup community preaches, if you put aside your personal views on the subject, you might also be able to see the greater good in what Neil is doing. Likewise, you might also be able to see the greater evil. On one hand, Neil encourages people to reach a new potential. On the other hand, with this new found power comes responsibility, which could be misused if used by the wrong person.

I didn’t go to this event solo. If you guys remember Marina Tsipenyuk, who recently wrote The evolution of co-mentoring relationships: a quest for dialogue, accompanied me to the signing. Before we went I gave Marina a fair warning that Neil’s fans would most certainly be actively practicing pickup techniques. Unfortunately, after all attempts were made, she was left unimpressed by any pickup approaches that night.

During Q&A Marina asked Neil a really interesting question that got a great laugh from the crowd:

How does a man who uses The Game approach a woman that uses The Rules.

If you haven’t heard, The Rules is a step by step booklet that tells woman how they should act toward a man, in order to first have him fall for her, but ultimately find and marry Mr. Right. This question got a few laughs, but I think it’s a really interesting topic that I’ll cover at a later time.

My overall impression is that Neil is a very down to earth guy, and I hope to see more of him as he continues his career in pickup, personal development and writing. If you haven’t done so, pick up The Game, and Rules of the Game on amazon or your local book store.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

As you may or may not know, I’m not a big fan of being late. This is why I like to come early on days when I go to see my life coach.

This time around I came a whole 30 minutes early, and decided to brain storm some ideas in my moleskin. In order to get a little privacy, I sat in the back of the waiting room, where I don’t usually sit.

In my new location, I noticed a poster on the wall with a list that I just couldn’t ignore. The list was ‘An Eschatological Laundry List‘ by Sheldon Kopp, which is from his ‘If You Meet The Buddha On The Road, Kill Him‘.

The list proved to be very interesting, and thought provoking for me. I’ll say right now that I don’t agree with every single point on the list, but overall it got me thinking, and I thought it was share worthy.

1. This is it.
2. There are no hidden meanings.
3. You can’t get there from here, and besides there is no place to go.
4. We are already dying, and we’ll be dead a long time.
5. Nothing lasts!
6. There is no way of getting all you want.
7. You can’t have anything unless you let go of it.
8. You only get to keep what you give away.
9. There is no particular reason why you lost out on some things.
10. The world is not necessarily just. Being good often does not pay off and there’s no compensation for misfortune.
11. You have the responsibility to do your best nonetheless.
12. It’s a random universe to which we bring meaning.
13. You really don’t control anything.
14. You can’t make anyone love you.
15. No one is any stronger or any weaker than anyone else.
16. Everyone is, in his own way, vulnerable.
17. There are no great men.
18. If you have a hero, look again; you have diminished yourself in some way.
19. Everyone lies, cheats, pretends. (yes, you too, and most certainly myself.)
20. All evil is potentially vitality in need of transformation.
21. All of you is worth something if you will only own it.
22. Progress is an illusion.
23. Evil can be displaced but never eradicated, as all solutions breed new problems.
24. Yet it is necessary to keep struggling toward solution.
25. Childhood is a nightmare.
26. But it is so very hard to be an on-your-own, take-care-of-yourself-cause-there-is-no-one-else-to-do-it-for-you grown-up.
27. Each of us is ultimately alone.
28. The most important things each man must do for himself.
29. Love is not enough, but it sure helps.
30. We have only ourselves, and one another. That may not be much, but that’s all there is.
31. How strange, that so often, it all seems worth it.
32. We must live within the ambiguity of partial freedom, partial power, and partial knowledge.
33. All important decisions must be made on the basis of insufficient data.
34. Yet we are responsible for everything we do.
35. No excuses will be accepted.
36. You can run, but you can’t hide.
37. It is most important to run out of scapegoats.
38. We must learn the power of living with our helplessness.
39. The only victory lies is in surrender to oneself.
40. All of the significant battles are waged within the self.
41. You are free to do whatever you like. You need only face the consequences.
42. What do you know for sure…anyway?
43. Learn to forgive yourself, again and again and again and again.

What are your favorite points?

____
Photo by Benoutram

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

I’ve just received a copy of Leo Babauta’s freshly released ebook, Zen To Done. I devoured all 83 pages of this book just as soon as it hit my inbox, and I’m glad that I did.

Based on principle’s from David Allen’s Getting Things Done, and Steven Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Leo created a new system. The essence of this system is it’s simplicity in crafting habit changes that will serve you for a life time.

What I like about ZTD is that it is practical. You don’t have to have big file storage units or expensive electronic equipment to be effective in your productivity. Anyone can use this, for virtually anything. That’s another thing that I like about Zen to Done, you can mold it to your own style and personal preferences.

Table of Contents:

Introduction
1 Why ZTD?
2 Overview – What is it?
3 Minimal ZTD – the simpler alternative
4 Forming the 10 Habits
5 Habit 1: Collect
6 Habit 2: Process
7 Habit 3: Plan
8 Habit 4: Do
9 Habit 5: Simple, trusted system
10 Habit 6: Organize
11 Habit 7: Review
12 Habit 8: Simplify
13 Habit 9: Routine
14 Habit 10: Find Your Passion
15 A Day with Zen To Done
16 ZTD FAQ
17 Resources

Considering that the ebook costs under $10, comes with a money back guarantee, and will save you countless hours throughout your life, I think the risk of not reading it is far greater than spending what you would on a meal.

Purchase Zen To Done eBook

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!

The categories with which the library is organized are not dissimilar to the general categories of this site. The current sections are:

1. Health
2. Mental Development
3. Wealth
4. Communication, Relationships
5. Productivity, Organization, Goal Setting
6. Success

The book titles link directly to a purchase page on Amazon.com for your convenience. As a disclosure, you should know that if you purchase the book from Amazon via my link I’m going to get a 4% commission that comes out of Amazon’s profit. In other words, you win by getting a great book, and I win by getting about a nickel for every purchase (hey those add up too!).

Why read books in the first place?

Some authors put decades of experience, knowledge and research into a single book. Image being able to capture a decade of someone’s life within the week that it takes you to read a book. With just one book a week, you would have gotten over 500 years worth of other peoples experience within a year. No point reinventing the wheel – get the blueprints for life at the personal development books section.

Attention: Don’t forget to download my free ebook, How to Get a Girlfriend!!